How to Save a Life?

Step one you say "we need to talk"
He walks you say "sit down it's just a talk"
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Sometimes I just sit here and wonder why my life is the way it is. I mean, these verses remind me, vaguely, of the intervention with my dad, except the words weren't so polite. In the end, it didn't help hardly at all. He lied about drinking, the money he spent. He denied he ever hurt us in any way. I wondered why I even tried to make a difference. I wondered why I even said anything.

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend

Somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

I remember all those days I didn't go out with my friends, those days I didn't go places with my mom and brother, just to make sure he didn't hurt himself. I knew he wouldn't do anything if I was there. But in the end...I don't know. He's supposed to be getting help. I hope and pray he is.

Let him know that you know best

Cause after all you do know best

Try to slip past his defense

Without granting innocence

Lay down a list of what is wrong

The things you've told him all along

And pray to God he hears you

And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend

Somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

I remember the last day I saw him. He was irrational. I use that word to explain him now. Irration. I'd rather not use crazy...or deranged. Sick, ill, mentally unstable. I can't use those words. But even though we tried, he still...he still drank, he still put us down, he still made us feel worthless and ashamed of ourselves and him.

As he begins to raise his voice

You lower yours and grant him one last choice

Drive until you lose the road

Or break with the ones you've followed

He will do one of two things

He will admit to everything

Or he'll say he's just not the same

And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend

Somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend. Somewhere along in the bitterness, and I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known how to save a life...

But I don't know how to save someone. Especially one who doesn't want to be saved. I am so angry at my dad. But he can't help it...he has a chemical imbalance. I don't know...I guess I'm mad that he didn't go see a doctor.

*sigh*

I'll write again later.